June 30-Maimi, FL-John Lannan became devastated and started crying when informed that his roommate and best friend forever Joel Hanrahan had just been traded to the Pittsburgh Pirates. When asked for comment on the situation Lannan could only say, "Words can't describe what I am feeling right now, Joely will be missed greatly."
Other teammates didn't seem to care so much. "I freakin love Pittsburgh, it's the greatest place ever, lucky for Joel," said Nationals reliever Joe Beimel.
"Sucks for Joel to be traded with Lastings," said Nationals acting GM Mike Rizzo. "No matter what happens I look good and Joel is forgotten because I got that bum Milledge outta here and got something back for him."
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